Site Logo
Looking for girlfriend > 40 years > How to love your boyfriend with depression

How to love your boyfriend with depression

She shares her experience of a complicated love. My husband was pacing the room, hands wringing, his features distorted by fear. I used to believe him when he told me everything was fine. Matt has been suffering from mental illness since the suicide of a close friend 13 years ago, shortly before we started going out. As a result, he has always been skilled at putting on a brave face.

Content:
SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: How to Support a Loved One Struggling With Mental Illness

What it feels like to love with a man with depression

Dating someone with depression can be an intimidating prospect, but by understanding a few basics you can set the stage for a strong and loving relationship. By acknowledging your own needs and getting involved in their healing process , you can support both your partner and yourself as you embark on this new adventure. Starting a relationship can be an exhilarating time; everything is new and exciting and there is so much to discover. Everyone feels sad from time to time, but depression is different than normal mood fluctuations.

Understanding the reality of depression is vital to being a good ally as you embark on your relationship. Educate yourself about the illness; there are endless online resources where you can read about depression from both medical and personal standpoints to help you gain a deeper understanding of what the illness looks and feels like.

Instead, ask them about their experience and respect their boundaries. Stay flexible and consider activities that are within their comfort zone. Instead of going out to dinner, have a nice meal at home.

Instead of going to that party, stay in and watch movies. Sometimes they may simply not be up for socializing at all and need some alone time; try to be respectful of their needs without taking it personally. Depression is a complex illness that affects mood in myriad ways. Recognizing their illness for what it is is essential to being an ally.

Discounting their feelings by automatically attributing them to depression only serves to hinder honest conversation and emotional connection. It is heartbreaking to see someone you care about in pain, and your natural reaction is probably to try to make it all okay.

But depression is not cured by love or kindness. The truth is that there are no quick fixes for depression. However, there are many things you can do to support someone struggling with depression. Figuring out what those things are requires open communication. Ask them what they need from you to make them feel supported. Ask them what their triggers are, what they do to cope, and what part they want you to play in their coping strategies. What helps them may be very different than what helps someone else and honoring their individual needs is important, even when what they need is to not have you do anything at all.

Allow the person you are dating to have their feelings. I feel sad because XYZ happened. Mystery solved! Being open and understanding about these issues is vital to nurturing your relationship. After all, your bad day at work seems like nothing compared to mental illness. You cannot turn it off because your partner is depressed, nor should you have to.

Make sure you have your own supports in place that give you space to express yourself, such as friends, family, and support groups. Find a healthy way to get the stress out.

Recognize the hard work your partner is doing and be their biggest cheerleader as they seek the help they need to heal. Tell them you are proud of them for going to treatment and respect their limits when it comes to talking about what they are doing in therapy. Some people will be very open about what they are learning and discovering, while others prefer to keep it private. Whether or not you feel comfortable bringing this up will, of course, largely depend on your level of intimacy; telling someone to seek residential treatment on the second date, for example, may not elicit the best reaction.

But if you have built a strong foundation of trust, respect, and care, suggesting they take their treatment to a higher level of intensity could be the best gift you could give them. It may help if you do your own research into depression treatment options first so you can provide guidance; for your partner, making those decisions on their own while they are gravely ill could be extremely difficult and feel exhausting.

The family and couples therapy offered by some residential treatment programs provides an ideal space for you to learn more about each other and how to navigate your relationship in a way that promotes healing.

With the help of compassionate clinicians, you can develop strategies for supporting your partner in meaningful ways that will aid them on their recovery journey while also establishing healthy boundaries. Dating someone with depression can be difficult, confusing, and painful at times.

But you already know there is much more to them than their illness, and getting through the hard parts together can give you a deeper appreciation for each other. Contact us to learn more about our renowned Los Angeles programs. We can help you or your loved one start on the path to healing. Treatment Specialties. View Our Facilities. Meet Our Experts. We are here to listen compassionately Our free, confidential telephone consultation will help you find treatment that will work for you, whether it is with us or a different program We can guide you in approaching a loved one who needs treatment.

Skip to content Admissions Search for:. Quick Links 1. Depression is Complicated and Real 2. Stay Flexible 3. You Cannot Fix Them 6. Accept Their Feelings and Their Confusion 7. Acknowledge Your Own Needs 9. Take Part in Their Healing. Depression is Complicated and Real Everyone feels sad from time to time, but depression is different than normal mood fluctuations. Begin Your Recovery Journey.

Email Us. Call for a Free Confidential Assessment. Is Depression Impacting Your Life? Previous Next. Related Blogs. October 10, August 8, Explore Bridges to Recovery. Contact an Admissions Specialist Today Learn more about our treatment programs, admissions process, and pricing. We are here to listen compassionately Our free, confidential telephone consultation will help you find treatment that will work for you, whether it is with us or a different program We can guide you in approaching a loved one who needs treatment We're here to listen.

Contact Us We're here to help. Thank you for your request for information. Admissions

Dating Someone With Depression: Everyone Can Win

Depression builds walls around people and between people. When someone you love has been dragged inside those walls, there can be a distance between you both that feels relentless. Not in the way you both want to be anyway. The symptoms of depression exist on a spectrum. Not everyone who has depression will have a formal diagnosis, so knowing what to watch out for can help to make sense of the changes you might notice.

Find out more about cookies and your privacy in our policy. Read about how Sara dealt with the overwhelming experience of helping her depressed boyfriend, and the lessons she learnt in the process. Seeing a loved one go through a hard time always impacts you in some way or another.

A scan of the statistics reveals: 1 in 5 Americans will experience mental health struggles in their lifetime. Two things we can learn from conversations about dating a partner with depression:. All relationships face obstacles, some more than others. Dating someone with depression is no exception, and can even be more challenging. However, those with depression often have incredible capacities for empathy, understanding, and emotional insight, which enrich relationships.

Dear Therapist: My Boyfriend’s Depression Is Making Me Question Our Future Together

No one teaches us how to navigate a relationship when mental illness or depression enters the equation. I recently read a Washington Post article by a woman whose relationship was torn apart while she and her partner tried to deal with his depression. Last year when I plunged into a depressive episode during our relationship, my partner was at a loss. He had never dealt with this and wanted so badly to help, but had no idea what to do. Sure we hit bumps along the road, but in the end I felt loved, supported, and understood in a way I never had before during a depressive episode, and he felt like he knew what was going on—a big deal in this situation—and was equipped to deal with it. It operates on the notion that the not-depressed partner is wonderful and selfless for standing by the partner with depression. They should therefore feel so lucky their partner is generously taking them on—ergo, broken and lucky. This means trying to follow their lead.

How You Can Better Love a Partner With Depression

Editor's Note: Every Monday, Lori Gottlieb answers questions from readers about their problems, big and small. Have a question? Email her at dear. My boyfriend and I are in our early 20s, and we recently moved in together after being in a long-distance relationship for four years. I can barely get a normal conversation.

Many people find themselves supporting a partner with depression at some point in their lives.

Dating someone with depression can be an intimidating prospect, but by understanding a few basics you can set the stage for a strong and loving relationship. By acknowledging your own needs and getting involved in their healing process , you can support both your partner and yourself as you embark on this new adventure. Starting a relationship can be an exhilarating time; everything is new and exciting and there is so much to discover. Everyone feels sad from time to time, but depression is different than normal mood fluctuations.

Tips for Coping With Depression in a Relationship

Standing on the sidelines when a partner battles depression can feel like a helpless experience. You might feel confused, frustrated, and overwhelmed. You are not alone.

Depression is devastating. When someone is experiencing depression, their entire life is blown apart. It can be a massive struggle just to make it through each day. But they aren't the only ones who struggle. Often forgotten are the loved ones of a person with depression.

Top 9 Things to Consider When Dating Someone With Depression

If you are in a relationship with someone who has depression, you are likely struggling with a mix of emotions and hosts of questions. What's it really like to feel depressed? What can you do to help them through hard times? How will their symptoms and treatment impact your relationship? While every person's experience with depression is unique, here are a few things you can do to help your loved one and yourself. A great way to support your loved one is to learn everything you need to know about depression, including its causes, symptoms, and treatments. Ask your partner's doctor for some reputable sources that provide the facts about depression, or do a quick search yourself on the Internet. You can start with the following reputable sources:.

Nov 29, - What's it really like to feel depressed? What can you do to help them through hard times? How will their symptoms and treatment impact your.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Comments: 3
  1. Nagul

    It is remarkable, rather valuable answer

  2. Vudok

    The authoritative message :)

  3. Fauzuru

    It is remarkable, rather valuable message

Thanks! Your comment will appear after verification.
Add a comment

© 2020 Online - Advisor on specific issues.